Another Miscarriage :(

So for those of you who don't know (which I think is all of you), I had another miscarriage this week. Bummer. This makes 2 in 5 months. Unlike the last pregnancy, I had no idea this one was coming. With my first miscarriage, I never felt any signs of pregnancy throughout the whole first 2 months. I knew that that wasn't normal but was just hoping that I was one of the "lucky" ones to feel great in my first trimester. So when I starting miscarrying, I wasnt too surprised. I was sad of course, but not surprised. With this last pregnancy, however, I felt all the signs of pregnancy and was nausiated a lot during it. I thought that this was a good sign and got my hopes up! I even made it to the 10 week mark and was relieved that I only had 2 more weeks to go to get into the "safe" zone. Unfortunately, I couldnt keep the baby. On our way home from AZ, I started bleeding and knew what was coming since I had been through it before. Once we arrived to Cuiliacan, we rushed over to my doctors office there and he took good care of me. (I had already lost the baby by this time). He performed an ultrasound and found that there was still some tissue left in there. So he performed a mini D&C on me and extracted a lot of tissue using a syringe. So anyways, he has been having me come into the office every other day to make sure the tissue is decreasing and that there is no infection, hopefully this coming Tuesday will be my last day. We have talked to him about our concern with having 2 miscarriages in a row and our chances of having a third, and he has taken some tissue sample and blood test to run an analysis on it to see what he can find out. Dont worry, we dont think anything is seriously wrong!
So, Im not writing about my experience with having miscarriages for everyone to feel sorry for me ( there are some people out there who go through trials that I cannot even fathom) but I simply want to try to help someone out there who may be having a tough time going through the same thing or another difficult trial. I have felt strongly that one of the reasons why I am going through this right now is so that sometime in my life (either now or later), I can maybe help other women who experience the difficulties of having miscarriages. I think when a woman finds out she is pregnant, she feels an instant bond to that tiny life growing inside of her, and to lose it is very painful and tough to go through. I always had the fear of having miscarriages or of infertility issues before I had Ethan, but I never would have thought it might be a problem after. After I had Ethan I thought, "Oh this is great! We can have each kid 1/12 to 2 years apart, stop when we get to 8 or 9 kids and by that time, I wont even be 40! Perfect!" I have found out however, that our "perfect" plan of life does not always follow the Lord's perfect plan for us, and I know that His plan is perfect, not ours. I know that we will recieve all the precious little children the Lord has for us in due time- I just have to learn how to be patient!
I know that those of us who are searching for peace and comfort during hard times, can find it through prayer and through our Savior. He has felt all the pain that we feel and He understands more than anyone what you might be going through. I know that we can feel so much strength from others' faithful prayers and that there is so much hope and joy in this life on earth! I feel so lucky to have the wonderful little boy that I have and plan on enjoying the one on one time that I have with him now, because I know that it wont always be that way! Im so grateful for my supportive husband who has been there through everything with me and who never has a negative thing to say. I am grateful for his positive outlook on life, how he always looks on the bright side of things. He has taught me so much! Well, I feel as if I am not the most articulate writer there is and I can never quite write how I want to say things, but I hope that I have helped someone out there who might be reading this. I hope I have helped them feel that their Savior loves them very much and again that you can always find peace and comfort through Him.
But, all in all, we are doing great and are loving life! We feel as if all the experiences we have had together has made us stronger and we are grateful for them. We have complete trust in our Heavenly Father and know that He knows what is best for us and hopefully I wont be having to make any more of these miscarriage announcements anytime soon, eh?! Luckily, Im still young and have lots of child-bearing years ahead of me! Thanks for reading if you have read this far and look for more post to come on our awesome Thanksgiving holiday in AZ!